Next morning I woke up and joined soberrecovery.com. I started writing posts and kept going. Fast forward 5 years later and I still have all these significant moments that changed me into the man I’ve become today. First was when I moved to New Hampshire in 2004 halfway through my freshman year. Prior I had lived in Connecticut since 1994. In which I had all of my childhood friends since kindergarten. That was the toughest move I ever had to do. The plan was clear my dad’s health was not the greatest and he wanted to open up a restaurant closer to my oldest brother so we could run it as a family one day. My mom and dad had not been getting along for a while. June 16th 2004 I had gotten home from dirt bike riding with my friend Billy and I was exhausted and I passed out in my bedroom to be woken up by my sister and my dogs barking. I open my door and my mom had the phone in her hand and was saying I’m calling the cops and your father he hit me. Next thing I know the cops are in my room. Telling me to keep my sister calm and talking to me asking us questions to this day I’ve seen my dad less than a dozen times. He’s was never really part of my life and probably never will be.
Fast forward to 19 years old no father since 14 years old I made poor choices and just wanted to drink and smoke my pain away. Which landed me a DWI and then in jail for 30 days for resisting arrest and disorderly conduct shortly after. 2008 was a bad year. I got out of jail and started washing dishes at my oldest brother’s restaurant. While sleeping on my other brothers couch until I found a room for rent and met my girlfriend Cassie in which we stayed together for 6 years and lived in Key West for 2 of them because her father lived down there and we planned it out to move down there. When I stopped drinking in 2014 it put a divide in our relationship because I didn’t want to be around people who where drinking or partying constantly and she was still in that phase so she left me. I went through multiple women until I met Kayla and thought I might actually build a future with her but she had her plan and I wasn’t moving fast enough for her and after relationship counseling and lots of arguments I decddec to burn the bridge and find a new path. Being almost 30 I went through multiple women again until I met my beautiful current girlfriend Kathryn.
Something felt different about her from the first time we met. A feeling I couldn’t grasp ever feeling about a girl before. Right now for the first time in my life it feels like it’s in the right direction. I’ve been seeing a counselor for a few months working on my mental health and still hitting the gym just a little less because it takes a toll on your body lifting heavy. Kathryn has been a huge help more than she knows. I was so lost after my last relationship I was sleeping around with no emotions and no purpose to what I wanted to do with my life about to turn 30 thinking damn man where is my life going. Now reflecting on all of this what I’ve learned is that some wounds cut deep and will heal over time you just have to patch it up and not let it kill you. There have been many times I let a lot of personal wounds almost take my life. Even though I don’t write much more on sober recovery I’ll always have my posts to look back on to remind me of how far I’ve come and to keep trying and know that all this is worth it. Thanks for reading this guys and I hope everyone is doing well and staying strong!